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Sunday, December 16, 2012

The Sorceress

Our house is filled with conversations I can't follow - from Tracey's ones about homework and 'rainbow numbers' to Miss2's garble about Knee Butter to the quick Gatling sentences of Miss17 in general.

So today, when the Master20 led off a conversation about Dungeons & Dragons type gaming with Master7 and Miss9, I went off for a quick break to my own make believe happy place inside my head.

Don't get me wrong, I love the idea of using your imagination for a game, instead of pressing buttons and playing out someone else's creation on the big screen, I just prefer my fantasy world to be free of scrapping kids and fighting in general.

When I reentered the conversation, Miss9 and Master7 were still enthralled by Master20's description of Dark Elves and Wizards and Rogues. Only now their brother was leading them in a game.

"I'm a Swordmaster," Master7 explained to me. "I climbed up a tree to have a look around and The Sorceress lit a fire and the tree started to burn."

"Nice game," I said to Master20. "It's not enough they argue, now you're teaching them about weapons and encouraging pyromania?" But I was only teasing him.

"It's great, Dad," Master7 nodded at me. This game needs a fertile imagination so it was right up his alley. "I had to get down because of the fire so I jumped and my pants caught on fire so I ran around with my bum on fire trying to pat it out. I had to sit in a river." He was grinning.

Reminded me an awful lot of the old Daffy Duck and Roadrunner cartoons I used to watch as a kid, and I've never lit any illegal bush fires so I guess they're not being corrupted too much.

"So who's The Sorceress?' I asked, full knowing the answer but keen to have her tell me herself.

"That's me!" said Miss9, beaming as Miss5 joined the table. Clearly they were both loving the game and having a ball with their big brother.

"I want to be a Sorceress too!" cut in Miss5. "I'll put sauce all over me and wear a sauce bottle on my head."

How cute!

Still, it seems I'm not the only one in the house who can't quite follow a conversation. I left Master20 to work that one into the game. Afterall, he started it.

'raising a family on little more than laughs'

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About Me

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Bruce Devereaux is one of the nicest people he knows. When not at work he enjoys reading, writing, hiding from his children and not changing nappies.


His career, and if we used the term any more loosely an e might fall out, has included a gardener, a personal lender, a console operator, a stop/go man (not as big a bludge as you might think but great if you’re into sunburn, abuse and varicose veins), a cleaner of banks and pubs and, for a very brief period, a door to door salesman (until the last door he knocked on was answered by a very scary woman with tremendously hairy legs).


Bruce Devereaux currently works as a forty-five-year-old award winning customer service officer (glass statuette available upon request) for the Bank of Queensland and as a very casual employee for Corrective Services. He likes to believe he excels at both but then he has always been prone to exaggeration.


His favourite colour is green, with a picture of Dame Nellie Melba on one side and General Sir John Monash on the other. His favourite flower is self-raising.

 If you see him around town, call his wife immediately - he's probably snuck out and left her alone with all the kids.


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