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Tuesday, October 30, 2012

The Media Tart Strikes Again!


The girls at work have dubbed this photo 'Beauty & the Beast' .
Personally, I think that's a little unkind - Talleea looks quite nice.

As many of you know, I am a media tart.

There's nothing I like more than getting my face in the paper. I figure future generations will appreciate the lengths I go to when they're leafing through old newspaper clippings for any mention of their ancestors.

Sure, their triumphant calls of, "Here's one!" will probably be quickly followed by sighs of, "Wait, it's only him again," but at least they'll get a moments thrill in what will otherwise, without my camera-hogging efforts, likely be a thankless and unfruitful search.

The reporter, Craig Warhurst, actually came into the branch to interview someone else, but I managed to elbow my way into his article - a piece on the $70,000,000 lotto up for grabs tonight.

Some people say winning lotto wouldn't change them. It would change me. You'd barely recognize me after all the liposuction, tummy tucking, chin removal and neck replacement. Maybe you'd think there was something vaguely familiar about the smooth faced bloke driving through the bottleshop in his brand new Fisker Karma, but you'd think, 'No, it can't be Bruce. He never bought a carton of beer which wasn't on special.'

My parents once won second division in Lotto. They looked up the previous week and it paid $5000! They rang my brother, sister and myself and told us to go out to dinner - their shout. We each had $200 to spend. Come Monday they found they'd won $500, so they were down $100.

Good luck to anyone who's in the draw. I've gone online and purchased my $2.40 entry (you can buy less games, and therefore spend less, online) so I've been making lists of how I'll spend it and who I'll give it to all week. Please note, if YOU win lotto, you were on MY list, so I'll expect a bit of quid pro quo.

If you'd like to read the newspaper article featuring yours truly as it appeared today you can click over using this link - THE GYMPIE TIMES
This would be our new 'date night' car. It's perfect because
we couldn't possibly fit seven kids in the back.


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5 comments:

Jennifer Davis said...

It's also the perfect car because you couldn't possibly make any more babies in it! Lol.

Jennifer Davis said...

P.S that news article is great, I love that you are their go-to expert.

Bruce Devereaux said...

Yes, we were chuckling about that at work. I'm the resident expert on whose turn it is to bring in morning tea and not much else. But I can punch figures into a calculator with the best of them :)

KateM said...

I had to come back and post what happened with our Mr0 (almost 2 weeks old) he's a political media tart, at the end of the Remembrance Day Ceremony this morning was passed from pollie to pollie with lots of photos and asking for spelling of his name :-) Poor kid...

Bruce Devereaux said...

Good idea, starting them young :)

About Me

My photo

Bruce Devereaux is one of the nicest people he knows. When not at work he enjoys reading, writing, hiding from his children and not changing nappies.

 

His career, and if we used the term any more loosely an e might fall out, has included a gardener, a personal lender, a console operator, a stop/go man (not as big a bludge as you might think but great if you’re into sunburn, abuse and varicose veins), a cleaner of banks and pubs and, for a very brief period, a door to door salesman (until the last door he knocked on was answered by a very scary woman with tremendously hairy legs).

 

Bruce Devereaux currently works as a forty-five-year-old award winning customer service officer (glass statuette available upon request) for the Bank of Queensland and as a very casual employee for Corrective Services. He likes to believe he excels at both but then he has always been prone to exaggeration.

 

His favourite colour is green, with a picture of Dame Nellie Melba on one side and General Sir John Monash on the other. His favourite flower is self-raising.

 If you see him around town, call his wife immediately - he's probably snuck out and left her alone with all the kids.


 

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