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Sunday, June 3, 2012

Bang Bangs

After enjoying the concert last week, Tracey and I have been looking for another artist to go see.

"George Michael is coming at the end of the year," our friend Mel informed us.

"That'd be great," Tracey said. Father Figure, Faith, Fast Love - I agree he's got some fantastic tunes. One thing I have noticed over the years, though, is admitting you like George Michael is on par with liking Boy George: there is a bit of a stigma.

"I'm not going to be the only straight guy there, am I?" I asked my wife. Not that I care a hoot if people think I'm gay or straight or have fish fetishes, but the fact is I occasionally do something which makes people wonder. 

Like last week when a customer came in with a new haircut and I naturally complimented her.

"Nice bangs," I said as she left. "They suit you."

She was out the door before I noticed a bloke I know standing a few feet away, giving me a strange look. "What the hell is a bang?" he asked.

"Straight fringe," I informed him.

"How do you know that?" he asked me doubtfully.

"Saw it on an episode of America's Next Top Model." And he finally relaxed a bit. I'm assuming the idea I was perving on  pretty girls on the telly saved my reputation. But he wasn't finished with the questions.

"Why do they call them bangs and not a bang?" 

"No self respecting girl wants to walk into a hairdressers and ask a stranger for a bang," I told him.

While my sexual bent seemed to have been sorted, he left looking doubtful over the whole bang vs bangs issue. 

I just hope he works it out before he asks his barber for a hairscut. 

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About Me

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Bruce Devereaux is one of the nicest people he knows. When not at work he enjoys reading, writing, hiding from his children and not changing nappies.


His career, and if we used the term any more loosely an e might fall out, has included a gardener, a personal lender, a console operator, a stop/go man (not as big a bludge as you might think but great if you’re into sunburn, abuse and varicose veins), a cleaner of banks and pubs and, for a very brief period, a door to door salesman (until the last door he knocked on was answered by a very scary woman with tremendously hairy legs).


Bruce Devereaux currently works as a forty-five-year-old award winning customer service officer (glass statuette available upon request) for the Bank of Queensland and as a very casual employee for Corrective Services. He likes to believe he excels at both but then he has always been prone to exaggeration.


His favourite colour is green, with a picture of Dame Nellie Melba on one side and General Sir John Monash on the other. His favourite flower is self-raising.

 If you see him around town, call his wife immediately - he's probably snuck out and left her alone with all the kids.


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